M has given up so much of her life to help us create a family. She will be living in the surrogate house until the birth. The surrogate house has a maid, a cook, and round the clock medical attention. M's family lives nearby, and they can visit at anytime during the day. M lives with her parents and her three sons. Her parents will care for her older sons while she is in the surrogate house, and her youngest (2 years old) can stay with her in the surrogate house. M became a surrogate so she could pay for her sons' education. She found out about Dr. Patel's surrogacy program through her sister, who had been a surrogate. M first tried surrogacy with another couple under Dr. Patel's care, but sadly, it didn't work out. I am happy for M that things so far are working out well this time. How do you thank someone for a gift as great as the one she is giving us? I will be thinking of this for the next eight months...well, actually, for the rest of my life.
Now that we have cleared the"are we pregnant?" hurdle, we are facing a new set of issues. We are in the critical phase of the first trimester. While it is comforting to know that M has access to 24 hour medical care, it is hard to not physically be there with her. I am a very empathetic person by nature, so I worry for M and hope that our pregnancy doesn't cause her much discomfort, sickness, or pain. I hope that it is as easy as it can possibly be for her.
Anyone pursuing surrogacy should know that it is the ultimate team effort.
- M is the captain - the glue (literally) that holds us all together
- I am the quarterback - in charge of distributing the ball (or eggs, if you will)
- B is on special teams - usually on the sidelines, but an indispensible part of the team
- Dr. Patel is the coach - writing the play book and leading us all to victory
We have learned to trust in and have created a lifelong bond with our new teammates. Although we all have different tasks we all share the same goal.